I'll Make This Short...

because, well, I don't really care. And it's sort of off-topic. But the writing is...wow. So: here we go!


Upholding the Standards of Smooth Jazz Purists

What? Who?

Have you seen the Wikipedia entry on smooth jazz lately?

No. No, I have not. Also, your hyperlink leads to a Times article about Wikipedia, not the Wikipedia page you’re referencing. Do you find that odd? Because I do.

Probably not,

You guessed right!

but it’s a mess. The administrators have tagged almost every section with provisos: “Its neutrality is disputed”; “needs additional citations for verification”; “reads like an advertisement”; may contain “unverified claims.”

These things are true. (I went and looked. Oops.) Here is the link to the page that you should have linked. The one you mentioned in your opening sentence?

Poor smooth jazz, besieged by haters. Being righteous about what’s called traditional jazz is easy. Being righteous about smooth jazz is much more difficult. It is a commercial construct, a radio format more than a style of music. For 20 years it has appealed across race and class and gender, partly because it asks so little. It is a physical presence but an intellectual absence. It is an unverified claim.

If the “it” at the end of your paragraph is a pronoun standing in for “smooth jazz”, which is what all of the other “its” in the paragraph are doing, then you’ve just asserted that:

“Smooth jazz is an unverified claim.”

That makes…little and/or no sense. Let’s see if we can sort this out.

Poor smooth jazz, besieged by haters.

It is true that smooth jazz, being largely awful, has many detractors. I don’t know if I feel sorry for smooth jazz for this reason, but fine. You are free to feel sorry for smooth jazz. That is a strange thing to do, though. Sometimes I feel sorry for sadness. It’s so sad!

Being righteous about what’s called traditional jazz is easy.

I think I get the thrust of this idea. Sort of. “Being righteous” seems to mean something like “being a purist”. Or an advocate? Defender? Right? Maybe? Also: is it really easy? To do that well, you have to know an awful lot of the literature.

Being righteous about smooth jazz is much more difficult.

Sigh. Okay.

It is a commercial construct, a radio format more than a style of music.

Yes.

For 20 years it has appealed across race and class and gender, partly because it asks so little.

Yes. It asks so very, very little.

It is a physical presence but an intellectual absence.

I…sort of. It exists, but is not intellectually challenging. I concur.

It is an unverified claim.

Nope. I still don’t get it. That is an extremely nonsensical thing to write in the leading newspaper in the country. What is claimed? What is not verified? Your metaphor, sir, confounds me.

Oh, well. I will say that I did not know that Kenny G’s real name is “Kenny Gorelick”. Learning is fun!

Bonus: Here is a picture of Kenny Gorelick that is fun to look at!