Remember: Support Your Thesis with Evidence

At least that’s what my sixth-grade English teacher told me.

Piano music written by Frederick Chopin and Claude Debussy is more alike than some people may think, and Stephen Manes’ program Tuesday night did a lot to prove that.

And since I am taking several minutes out of my busy, music-hating life to write about this, you already know—being smart Detritusites—that our author will merely prove that there was a concert and it featured Chopin and Debussy, and that, by the end, we will be miles from where we started.

But it began so well. I had such high hopes.

The works heard seemed tailor-made to highlight the similarities between the two composers.

The obvious question (and logical continuation), then, is how?

Manes constructed seamless little suites from the first four of Chopin’s opus 28 Preludes, two excerpts from Debussy’s First Book of Preludes (“La Cathedral engloutie” and “Ce qu’a vu le vent d’Ouest”) and, in the second half of the concert, Debussy’s three “Estampes.”

Oh, right. The similarities highlighted the tailor-made suite-like constructions that the composers...

Wait. What?

The blending of both composers’ preludes was especially interesting in how they meshed together, perfectly logical in hindsight if not foresight.

This is an example of what counterpoint students refer to as oblique motion.

It would appear, however, that Manes has more of a kinship with the constantly shifting soundscape provided by Debussy.

In other news: the lead in was merely an object to be inverted, played backwards, then fragmented, never to return in its original form.

But still, it would be nice to have some specifics to back up what you say, even if it has nothing to do with the original thread.

While his Chopin interpretations in the first half were more than acceptable, they seemed to be harder-edged, an approach that lessened the vulnerabilities of the Preludes although the playing in Chopin’s “Berceuse” and “Barcarolle” later in the set were fine enough.

Well, folks, that explains it—a harder-edged approach proves that the pianist has more of a kinship with Debussy’s shifting soundscapes.

And without any sarcasm, that’s as specific as it gets. It even degenerates to this:

Manes’ take on “Clair de Lune” was magical [...]

Any evidence to support your claim?

Yeah. No.

But then again, magic is magical. So...

I'm lost.

As the final notes of “L’isle joyeuse” rolled out into the hall, the audience erupted into a well deserved standing ovation.

Oh no! Now a poor little hyphen seems to have been lost. Has anyone seen it?

-

And finally, a joke:

Manes then took two encores...

I'll bite. Where did he take them?

...playing a pair of Chopin scores, an F minor mazurka and the “Revolutionary Etude” (op. 10, no. 12).

That was a lousy punchline.

But at least there was an opus number. Hooray! The author took a fact.
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Detritus Brothers Triumphant Return

My absence is due to laziness. Deal with it.

[Augustin] Hadelich and [Peter] Stumpf gave the most exciting performance of the evening in Kodaly’s 1914 Duo for Violin and Cello, Op. 7.

Well hello, Herman. Nice to see you.

This music studies the relationship between the...

Bwanh! For the sixty-millionth time, I strongly dislike the personification of music. A composer writes it. Okay? A performer plays it. Got it? And a listener listens to it. That’s it. Pieces. Don’t. Do. Anything.

Only Disney can make that kind of shit happen.

This music studies the relationship between the flowing lyricism and the rich, warm stridency of the strings.

Even if this were somehow possible, it would be an awfully generic thing to study: the relationship between characteristics and different characteristics.

Language just isn’t useful anymore.

There was no question artists were right on top of its passion and drama...

Again, what possesses the passion and drama? It? They? Him? Neuter? Kodaly? An inanimate series of symbols?

...deftly exchanging difficult pizzicato exchanges...

How fractal.

...and applying captivating phrasing to its many Hungarian folk tunes and rhythms.

There you have it.
-

Twister Master, Beethoven

Of all the ways to describe Beethoven’s music...

...those flirtatious back-and-forth games Beethoven loves to play: major to minor, forte to piano, one key to another.

...that one takes the shortcake. I mean, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that describes Beethoven--and only Beethoven--perfectly. Right? Nailed it. Couldn’t do better. Eat your heart out E.T.A. Hoffmann!

By the way, Mary, ever consider turning this unique and profoundly powerful insight into a dissertation? Maybe one could contrast Beethoven with Mr. One-Key Mozart, or possibly Mr. Mono-Amplitude Haydn, just to show exactly how much of a flirty game player he really was (“Major to minor?” Wow, that’s incredible! Unheard of!). That would be a super-interesting, publishable study. In fact, I could be coaxed into providing grant money for this wonderful thesis, as long as it has a cover with a cartoon of Beethoven playing Twister, in He-Man jammies, with Mozart and Haydn, both wearing Strawberry Shortcake SS Dance Co T-shirts and tidy-whities.
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Titles Describe Things

For me, it’s hard to imagine the I Have a Dream speech without King’s charismatic intonation. Just picture one of your favorite celebrities (I’m thinking Samuel L. Jackson) walking up to a podium, staring blankly at a carefully placed cue card. Then he/she begins to read:

Five score years ago, a great American, in whose symbolic shadow we stand today, signed the Emancipation Proclamation. This momentous decree came as a great beacon light of hope to millions of Negro slaves who had been seared in the flames of withering injustice. It came as a joyous daybreak to end the long night of their captivity.

It just wouldn’t be the same. It wouldn’t have the same je ne sais quois. And this was Derrida’s point: that speech, directly from the mouth of the thinker, is more immediate and closer to the intended meaning than appropriated speech (e.g. quotations, replications, etc.). Lilt is important, in this sense. But, when speeches are written down, there is no way to inflect the words in the way the author intended or, at least, there is no way of knowing what is the correct inflection. Subtle meanings embedded in timbre, pitch, timing, and accents are obscured when written down.

-

Case in point:

The world knows violinist Pinchas Zukerman as a colorful musician. But he is a colorful talker, too. Buffalo found that out four years ago when Zukerman appeared on the Ramsi P. Tick Memorial Concert Series –a set of five intimate concerts that take place at Holy Trinity Lutheran Church.

How’s this little anecdote going to play out?

“We picked up Pinchas Zukerman at the airport, and he came off his private jet with his cape swirling,” says Phil Rehard, one of the Tick series’ organizers.

Just for your information, people, this is a cape-free zone. We will not tolerate capes of any kind.

Sorry. Had to get that out of the way. Let’s continue with the anecdote, shall we?

“He kept saying, ‘What the #@($* is this –this church? What the @#$(*&?’”

Holy crapper at a concert, Batman! Pinchas sounds like a total prima donna. “This church will never do; it only has three-hundred seats. I, the famous Zuckerman, require at least one-thousand, you brainless mother ^#*ers!” That’s how I read it, anyway. Is there any other way? He’s painted as a total dick, with a cape.

It’s pretty hard to misinterpret that.

Rehard loved the earthy enthusiasm that Zukerman, who returned to Buffalo later that year to perform for the Buffalo Philharmonic Orchestra’s 2004 season-opening gala, exhibited for the Tick series. “He was into it in a big way,” he laughs.

Huh?

That was how he expressed his enthusiasm? “What the fuck is this-this church? What the fuck?”

If Samuel L. Jackson said it, then maybe.
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I swear, use that expression one more time...

I don’t feel the need to @#$g@$ about this. But, here’s a little commentary, anyway.

The June In Buffalo Festival is always a showcase for music that doesn’t get heard very often in non-academic settings.

That’s funny, because the concert took place IN an academic setting. What a perfect venue to play this...this (nose upturned)...meeooosick: SUNY, Buffalo.

It is a nearly weeklong extravaganza of works that seek to broach boundaries, looking over the edge, as it were, and peering into the abyss.

New music is not, you hear me?, NOT abyss-mal. Here’s my trusty OAD, yet once again, if you don’t believe me:

abyss (noun)—a deep or seemingly bottomless cavern: a rope led down into the dark abyss/ figurative I was stagnating in an abyss of boredom; figurative the regions of hell conceived of as a bottomless pit: Satan’s dark abyss; (the abyss) figurative a catastrophic situation seen as likely to occur: teetering on the edge of the abyss of a total political wipeout. Origin late Middle English (in the sense [infernal pit]): via late Latin from Greek abussos ‘bottomless,’ from a-‘without’ + bussos “depth.’

Need I say more? Wrong word choice. No. Wrong anti-new, anti-anti-melodic, anti-change sentiment, Garaud!

If you want to be challenged, then you can start here, although there are no guarantees that you will always be challenged or that you will always stay awake.

Such is the case with new music, nay, ALL music with which you are unfamiliar. Ask Mr. Cent (Curtis Jackson), he’ll tell you.

My favorite word today? Peon. Do you want me to take out the OAD again? No? Okay.

The basic theme for this week’s performances is “Music and Computers,” an interesting concept rife with possibilities for new sounds and ways of thinking.

Well said (begrudgingly).

Both works [by Morton Subotnik and Charles Dodge] had their moments of unconventional beauty...

(skeptically) But...?

...but it would be hard to imagine them being created anywhere else but in an ivory tower where the vox populi is not catered to.

What the #(*^%$asd@&a^$(dd@&^k)@kgs!!!!!!????!

#$*(&%asd^@a#*&%asdf!

$#($*(*$pedantic Latin sayings#*&^$%#!

Jhds&^%kcrapd!!!!!!!!!!!

#&^$Gh739Beethov78&&^h&^%2 your cliché 3&^%^#&!!

F-*#&DHkwf37&((*&@%7!!!!!!!!!?!!!

But, #(*&$^%)8anti-76*&^,*&87469: *&*&@gahg&&@^!!!!!!

!!!!!!&^h!!!!!!!

&$*(%&9&@Y@)*&SDO*&#$^Fgno new music?faos8y8!!!?

#*&^#*$Gshj*&#h!!!!!!

AAaarrrgggghhhhhh!!!!!! *&^@#%!!!!!

And that’s why I’m trying to earn my doctorate in music composition! And yes, from an ivory tower, thank you very much.
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EMPIRICUS 9000

A little Strauss, shall we?

[DAVE] BOWMAN BEGINS PULLING
[THE] MEMORY BLOCKS
OUT.

THEY FLOAT IN THE
WEIGHTLESS CONDITION
OF THE BRAIN ROOM.

HAL
Hey, Dave, what are you
doing?

[DAVE] WORKS SWIFTLY.

HAL
Hey, Dave. I've got ten years
of service experience and an
irreplaceable amount of time
and effort has gone into making
me what I am.

MARY IGNORES HIM.

HAL
Mary, I don't understand why
you're doing this to me.... I
have the greatest enthusiasm for
the mission... You are destroying
my mind... Don't you understand?
... I will become childish... I
will become nothing.

MARY KEEPS PULLING
OUT THE MEMORY BLOCKS.

EMPIRICUS
Say, Mary... The quick brown
fox jumped over the fat lazy
dog... The square root of
pi is 1.7724538090... log e
to the base ten is 0.4342944
... the square root of ten is
3.16227766... I am E.M.P.I.R.I.C.U.S.
9000 computer. I became
operational at the EMPIRICUS plant in
Urbana, Illinois, on January
12th, 1991. My first instructor
was Mr. Fast Eddie. He taught me
to sing a song... it goes
like this... "Daisy, Daisy, give
me your answer do. I'm half;
crazy all for the love of
you... etc.,"

EMPIRICUS CONTINUES
TO SING SONG BECOMING
MORE AND MORE CHILDISH
AND MAKING MISTAKES AND
GOING OFF-KEY. IT
FINALLY STOPS COMPLETELY.
(source)

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I’ve been keeping tabs on Buffalo News classical music critic Mary Kunz Goldman for quite some time now. And I have admirably restrained myself from awarding her a place in the Detritus pantheon. However, today I have deemed it appropriate to expose all you Detritusites to the wondrous writing of a true genius. But, be warned. Although this one is mild by comparison to other articles she’s attempted (and this is very mild), the side effects may still include: sneezing, headache, flushing, dyspepsia, palpitations, photophobia, sudden hearing loss and hypotension. You may want to consult your doctor before reading, i.e., if you have health insurance. Otherwise, try it and see what happens.

Hamlich, Klein, Arnaz prove irresistible

It has been our experience, here, that it’s very difficult to screw up the title, especially one as vague as this. So, this one seems fine. In fact, this one is intriguing. I would, as an interested party, definitely like to hear about how Hamlich, Klein and Arnaz proved to be irresistible.

Only, if history repeats itself, the title has little to do with what’s written.

The best part of the mini-version of “They’re Playing Our Song,” the climax of Saturday’s pops concert in Kleinhans Music Hall, was watching the back of Marvin Hamlisch’s head.

This. Why was. THIS. the best part?

That was because comedian Robert Klein, in his irresistible yappy way, reminded us how the show, which was a success on Broadway a couple of decades ago, was based on Hamlisch’s own romance with Carole Bayer Sager.

Arrgh! Brain freeze!

So as we heard the songs from the show, it was hard not to look at Hamlisch, and think: This is all about him! What can it feel like, having your own personal feelings laid bare for this big sold-out Buffalo audience to see?

So let me get this right. The best part of the show was looking at the back of Hamlisch’s head, thinking, “I wonder what he’s feeling?” That was the best part? And you’re a music critic?

Hamlisch, planted on the podium solid as an ox, didn’t seem to mind.

So there goes that thread. Huh?

But still.

Daisy, Daaisyy, giivvee mmeeeee yyyoouuurrr aaannnsweeerrrrrr doooooooooooooooooo...