Gauche

The abbreviated story of Ravel’s Concerto pour la main gauche en ré majeur, written for pianist Paul Wittgenstein:

In 1930, the French composer Maurice Ravel (author of the famous Bolero) composed the Piano Concerto in D major at the request of an Austrian pianist, Paul Wittgenstein, who, as the title implies, was left-handed.

Well, that’s not quite accurate. See, as the story goes, in World War I, Wittgenstein had been shot in the right elbow and captured by the Russians, then sent to a prisoner-of-war camp in Siberia. At some point during the horrific sequence of events, Wittgenstein’s right arm was amputated.

Thus ends the abbreviated story of Ravel’s Concerto pour la main gauche en ré majeur, for pianist Paul Wittgenstein.

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Now that you know the story, it’s time to look at this, from the Cleveland Plain Dealer’s very own Zachary Lewis:

In [the pianist’s] hand, the score's downward-dashing motif was like a focused stream of bullets...

[dismay]
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General Relativity

Einstein thought that time is a pliable fabric. But, I don’t think he meant it quite like this:

The Bayside Trio push the boundaries of modern classical music, performing works by living or recent composers.

You know, recent composers...

For their weekend of concerts the Bayside Trio will perform two works with mezzo-soprano Solange Merdinian: Maurice Ravel’s Chansons Madécasses...

...like Ravel, who has been dead, oh, since 1937. That’s right. Seventy-one years ago, Maurice Ravel died (he's certainly not living, so he must be recent, right?). Yet, Chansons Madécasses was written only a paltry eighty-two years ago, in 1926! At the time, Elliott Carter was only 17. The economy was alive and well. Herbert Hoover had a 53% approval rating (I made that up for my own satisfaction). The St. Louis Cardinals had just won their first World Series. The first transaltlantic telephone call just took place (“Uh...is Ivan Nuglibutt there?). 1926 was also the inaugural year for the National Bar Association. My how time flies when it has holes in it! Er...when it can be folded.

But I don’t blame our dear author too much. After all, there seems to be something of an all-encompassing sensory confusion thing taking place:

For some classical concert-goers, the group’s edgy program selections might be difficult to digest.

Chemical breakdown is a nice metaphor, if you’re into the campy cliché thing. (Really, is Ravel difficult to digest?) Instead, this is what I mean:

But the Bayside Trio perform for those who wish to see something different, something new, something alive. [drama mine]

So, the targeted audience is made up of...

Angela Stratiy, Andrew Foster, Ann Marie (Jade) Bryan, Bernard Bragg, Betty Miller, Christy Smith, Chuck Baird, Clayton Valli, Deanne Bray, Dummy Hoy, Heather Whitestone McCallum, I. King Jordan, Linda Bove, Marlee Matlin, Phyllis Frelich, Pinky the Deaf Juggler & Unicyclist, Terrylene Sachetti, Trix Bruce, etc.?

I don’t know about y’all, but I generally go to concerts to hear “something different, something new, something alive”--that's what usually happens when I go to a concert of music.

Then again, maybe I’m in my own strange dimension, because everyone seems to be seeing things out of whack.

“So many of my favorite modern composers came to classical music from a different place, like jazz or folk music,” says pianist Anastasia Antonacos. “The first classical composer they all seem to discover is Stravinsky and then they travel backward in time from there.”

(enter Rod Serling here)
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Mad Lib: for B.S. Generators

The Vivien Schweitzer-bot didn’t waste any time waxing poetic in this one.

When the violinist Midori and the pianist Marc-Andre Hamelin performed Ravel’s Sonata for Violin and Piano on Wednesday evening at the Rose Theatre, notes and phrases were as carefully placed as stones in a Japanese garden.

Arrange the extracted adjectives into their appropriate places. Then reboot.

delicate
languid
jazz-influenced
organic
smokey
sultry

But the details blended into a seamlessly ________ whole, flowing from a _______, _______ Allegretto into Midori’s _______, _______ rhapsodizing in the _______ second movement, then into the frenzy of the concluding Perpetuum mobile.

Good luck! Here is the answer.
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Someone Killed All of the Editors. Again.

String quartets try to reconciles jazz and tradition

What? Seriously? Jesus. Subject-verb agreement much?

The urge to reconcile jazz with classical music has persisted since the first classical folks stumbled into a jazz dive.

This is totally made up. You made that up. No research was done. “Classical folks” “stumbled” into a “jazz dive”. The subtext is not so subtext-y, Mr. Ward. Classical musicians/composers are/were elite, effite fucks who are totally alienated from the public. Also, jazz is/was played in dives.

The crusade continues,

The urge is now a crusade. Take note! Take that, unreconciled jazz/classical divide!

as the Ying and Turtle Island string quartets showed Tuesday at Rice University in their traveling gig aimed at assuring that all is well in the brotherhood of string ensembles.

I think I know what this sentence is trying to convey. One would think, though, that it was not written by a professional…writer. Surely it would have been constructed…better. I don’t know. It should probably be more than one sentence. Less passive voice? Let’s try to reconstruct it with the subject first.

“The Ying and Turtle Island string quartets showed that the crusade continues Tuesday at Rice University, in their travelling gig [ed: what?] aimed at assuring that all is well in the brotherhood of string ensembles.”

No, that still sucks.

Darius Milhaud is said to have started it all

By whom? (This is not true.) Also, passive voice. Just sayin'.

with his short ballet The Creation of the World (1922-23),

I think you mean La Création du Monde. But that’s ok, I’m an idiot and wouldn’t be able to understand cognates. Did you hear about Berlioz’s Fantastic Symphony?

inspired in part by a 1920 visit to a Harlem jazz club.

If true, this is the first useful, or, for that matter, concrete, piece of information so far. Bravo.

So the two ensembles used that work to start their second half, devoted to works of reconciliation.

I…what? Getting my sentence-parsing kit...

So the two ensembles

The two string quartets you mentioned, I assume.

used that work

Milhaud’s La Création du Monde, I think. This is unclear but, I guess, implied.

to start their second half,

The second half…of the concert? Or “travelling gig”? Did you mention the first half? Did I miss something? I don’t feel so good.

devoted to works of reconciliation.

Of jazz and “tradition”. Jazz is not a tradition. Or something. But at least I got through that sentence. That was dicey. So, to recap in word language:

“The Milhaud ballet began the second half of the concert, which was devoted to works reconciling jazz and traditional repertoire.”

Or something.

The first half of the Houston Friends of Music event contained "pure" music.

Sigh. “Pure” is in quotes, which should either mean a) someone said it, and you are quoting them, or b) you are being sarcastic, or sardonic. I don’t think either is the case. But I do it often enough for emphasis, so whatever.

However: what? What is “pure” music? Classical music? Wordless music? Unadulterated music? Music that has never known the love of a strong, smelly man?

The Yings, all siblings, offered a strikingly different accounts of Ravel's Quartet in F Major

My only prayer is that this egregious construction is meant to parallel the construction in the title.

Why, oh, why did we kill all of the editors and proofreaders? Sure, they were annoying. But they were necessary. They were sort of like lawyers, but for writing. *Sniff* I…miss them.

(Ravel was another Frenchman later awakened by the siren of jazz).

Again with this crap. Ravel was totally asleep before he heard jazz. Also, he was pretty short!

The rest of the thing is pretty much description. If you care, go read it here. I have but two quips left. Well, maybe three.

Except for the vivid Ravel quartet, the performances and arrangements were frequently bland and always unoffensive –

I wish I could say the same about your writings about them.

the sort that can make chamber music audiences feel good about being just a little naughty in letting barbarians inside the gates.

You are here to reinforce the classical/jazz divide. The “reconciliation” aspect was, apparently, lost on you, because it’s all you can talk about.

Perhaps hearing jazz played by a string quartet is a learned habit,

A…learned habit?

but the sameness of sound

Of the strings? Is that what you mean? Because it is not clear. Maybe reading your articles is a learned habit?

didn't allow solo voices to stand out the way they do in small jazz ensembles, which usually have a group of distinctive sounding instruments melding into a unit. When an alto sax takes off, you know it's not the piano or double bass.

Uh, yes.

Then, for me jazz has always worked better in nightclubs and jazz clubs rather than concert halls. I suspect part of the reason lies in the cultural legacy jazz carried as it came out of New Orleans. In many cases, it grew living on the edge. In most cases today, concert halls are designed to keep the edge out.

You are here to reinforce the jazz/classical divide. I get it now.

That is too bad.