Prefabricated Sentence Jar

[Hypothetical critic’s logic process] Hmm. I have to review a symphony tonight.

...

Okay! They are generally laid out in a fast-slow-fast scheme. (Good, so far.) Fast movements are generally punchy, with thrust. (Sweet.) And slow movements...

I know! They’re poetic and warm. Excellent. (pats own back)

Now, to the word processor! Hmm:

The audience (no) conductor had the cellos (nope) music...flowing...with a...broom (er) sweep, giving the fast movements outer movements (that way I can kill two birds with one duck [arg] stone) a lot of punch and thrust, and...in particular...bringing out the slow movement’s (which one was it again?) the second movement’s Adagio’s poetry and with warmth.

Good, but it could be better. Let’s see. Where are the nouns?

The conductor had the beautiful music flowing with a passionate sweep, giving the outer movements a lot of punch and thrust, and, in particular, bringing out the Adagio’s wistful poetry with admirable warmth.

Still, not quite right. I think I need an adverb:

The conductor had the darkly beautiful music flowing with a passionate sweep, giving the outer movements a lot of punch and thrust, and, in particular, bringing out the Adagio’s wistful poetry with admirable warmth.

On the right track. Just needs a personal touch:

The conductor had the darkly beautiful music flowing with a passionate sweep, giving the outer movements a lot of punch and thrust (not that there couldn't have been even a little bit more), and, in particular, bringing out the Adagio’s wistful poetry with admirable warmth.

And who says critics’ jobs are easy?

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[The conductor] had this darkly beautiful music flowing with a passionate sweep, giving the outer movements a lot of punch and thrust (not that there couldn't have been even a little bit more), and, in particular, bringing out the Adagio’s wistful poetry with admirable warmth.

Yikes. It sure didn’t require much insight, or attendance, to write that one, did it?
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Dear Cleveland Plain Dealer,

...and a delicately spoken FU, by Tim Smith, on the "reassignment" of critic Don Rosenberg of the Cleveland Plain Dealer.

I first heard about it today on KQED (NPR), which is definitely an out-of-the-way tidbit for them to run on-air. Also, according to KQED, the Plain Dealer is expecting layoffs in the near future.

(Again, painting by Jana Bartouskova)

P.S. I never read the Plain Dealer because it is horribly unnavigable.

This is how it happened

First, Richard Strauss (composer), with pen in hand: “I want this piece to be a telling expressive force.”

Second, Jose-Luis Novo (conductor), with baton in hand: “I want to conduct with a particular telling expressive force.”

Third, Tim Smith (Baltimore Sun Critic), with fingers on the qwerty keyboard:

“Novo shaped [Strauss’ Death and Transfiguration] with a particular telling expressive force.”

That’s how it happened, I swear.

Richard Strauss: Tod und Verklärung. A particular telling expressive force.

That’s what happened.